Saturday, May 17, 2008


I have a lot of thoughts about blog topics this week. Unfortunately, I can't get them down on the computer. I am on my knees (literally) typing this at my computer in the basement, thus limiting the amount of time I can type. So - I had the epidural on Wednesday. Most, most, most disappointingly, I have had no change in my pain level. If it is possible, I think the pain has actually gotten worse. That may be because I stopped taking pain meds for several reasons. One) I felt over medicated and 2) I had either a reaction to coming off Prednisone or caught some sort of virus that basically made me feel very hung-over for the past 5 days and 3) I wanted to see the true effects of the epidural. I was told that I could resume activities the NEXT day so I hoped off in the car on Friday to take the kids to school. I was smart enough to take Jay with me which was good because I wouldn't have made it home. It took at good 45 minutes upon returning home to get the pain under control. I will call the doc on Monday to see about getting another shot. As I think this is standard protocol, but am not sure. I cannot get into therapy until the 29th, but am going to call Monday to see if there isn't another location I can visit.

To add - I haven't been blogging because the laptop died - an abrupt and painful death. Jay thinks he will have it repaired on Wednesday - at least I will have contact with the outside world.

There is a small part of me that is very fearful that I will never get rid of this pain. It is the irrational side, I know, and lack of faith in God. Prayers would be greatly appreciated in this area as well as for Jay. He is hanging on by a thread. He is my hero.

1 comment:

HIllbilly Rockin' Robin said...

Oh, oh, oh! I am so sorry this has gone on for so long for you! Please grab your Streams in the Desert and read and reread! It will help you to keep your eyes on the prize amidst the pain!! Here is the one from today...
"They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb . . . and they loved not their lives unto the death" (Rev. 12:11).

When James and John came to Christ with their mother, asking Him to give them the best place in the kingdom, He did not refuse their request, but told them it would be given to them if they could do His work, drink His cup, and be baptized with His baptism.
Do we want the competition? The greatest things are always hedged about by the hardest things, and we, too, shall find mountains and forests and chariots of iron. Hardship is the price of coronation. Triumphal arches are not woven out of rose blossoms and silken cords, but of hard blows and bloody scars. The very hardships that you are enduring in your life today are given by the Master for the explicit purpose of enabling you to win your crown.

Do not wait for some ideal situation, some romantic difficulty, some far-away emergency; but rise to meet the actual conditions which the Providence of God has placed around you today. Your crown of glory lies embedded in the very heart of these things--those hardships and trials that are pressing you this very hour, week and month of your life. The hardest things are not those that the world knows of. Down in your secret soul unseen and unknown by any but Jesus, there is a little trial that you would not dare to mention that is harder for you to bear than martyrdom.
There, beloved, lies your crown. God help you to overcome, and sometime wear it. --Selected

"It matters not how the battle goes,
The day how long;
Faint not! Fight on!
Tomorrow comes the song."

I'm praying you will be singing the song tomorrow, dear friend!! I will be praying!!