Party Pooper

As if the holidays were not already crazy with to-do lists, Jay and I pack it in further with unending entertaining. We just can't get enough of our friends and family, I guess. Maybe it is the need to spread the love during this season. Perhaps we feel that entertaining is our way to give back to our friends for their gifts of love to us during the year. Since we both do not have the gifts of mercy, maybe we see this as some price for our lack of understanding or compassion throughout the year. Please forgive us, friends, now eat some cake. Or, possibly, we are just glutens for fun and frivolity. Of course, it might be the obvious. We have the best friends and family in the world and can't stand not having them with us, sometimes multiple times, through out the most wonderful time of year.

So, this evening, on January 1, after all of my immediate family has left the house, I plopped into a chair. 5 nights/days of entertaining this month and I am pooped. Time to gather up my house, put away the serving platters, pastry server, and take back the chafing dishes I borrowed from a friend.

I literally picked up our Christmas welcome mat this evening and didn't put our year-round one down. Not because visitors are no longer welcome. It is because Dixie decided to use it as her pee mat and after so many washings, it isn't coming clean.

Insanely, I am already thinking of our next "party." A family potluck soup and salad night with board games. Sounds like a perfect evening to occupy us during what is the longest cold snap our geographical location has experienced since 1977. Now ,where is my planner?

My cupholders runneth over

I have had lots of "my-mini-van-could-be-condemned-because-of-its-filth" sagas including a mouse that lived in it for several weeks, many milk, juice, and tea spills, a multitude of bodily function explosions, filth, trash, etc. I have tried to keep the car clean, honestly. But being in constant use with three kids plus on a near daily basis, it is what it is. I remember Jay having a fit about the state of my car one day and then I took a look at his - four verses one. No contest.

Recently, however, I knew I reached a new level when my son started making apologies to his friends when they came into our car. I also knew it had reached epic proportions when another mom said that Sadie went on and on about how clean their car was when she rode in it. I think my two oldest finally understand why we want a clean car.

So, there was a stink in the car for a couple of weeks. A stinky, musty odoriferous gag-inducing ick. No child could discover the source despite repeated request by me to search every corner and crevice. Finally, after gagging one morning on the way to school, I decided to don gloves and a trash bag and investigate. Into the deep recesses of the car I traveled, to the place I lovingly refer to as "Satan's Lair."

It didn't take long, the discover of which added to my ire. A sports-type cup leaking what I could only surmise was chocolate milk, somewhat solidified, nearly a cottage cheese consistency. The cup had been shoved into the seat pocket in front of the third row of seats. As I started poking around, I noticed a couple more cups shoved the other pocket, along with various snack bags, hair bows, a crayon, several lego pieces, an overdue library book and headphones for the car audio system. Yes, all of them with at least a couple drops of the souring brown liquid. Some had complete saturation.

Upon further discovery I found in the other pocket more treasures and delights similar to above. And then...if it couldn't get any worse, I spied the cupholders. I say that plural because the Honda Odyssey has something like 26 cup holders in it - I am not lying. I happened to see two joining ones and I know I gasped out loud. A left over mushy, fermenting apple from some weeks earlier, possibly a month or so, soaking in some gooey orange syrup from a disintegrating McDonald's cup. It was trying to become one with some chintzy gold necklace and a melted tube of chapstick. I know the hair on my neck started to stand up and possibly some slivers of steam began curling out of my ears.

In my zen-like state, I created a plan and a subsequent consequence for not obeying my plan, otherwise known as "discipline." The new rule: children must consistently keep the van cleaned up. How ingenious of me, right? Everything is to be brought in from the car when we get home. I mean EVERYTHING. No clothing, backpacks, shoes or coats left behind. I know, why do I have shoes and clothing lying around our car? Because the children change into swim gear three times a week leaving school uniforms, socks, etc. strewn about. They are also to keep all trash out of the back and bring in toys/electronics, too. Nirvana, right? The punishment for not doing their job? Vacuuming the entire car and cleaning all cupholders. My cupholders will not longer runneth over!

The first loss

An impromptu trip to a local furniture store took a very funny turn today.

We decided to search for a new sofa for our kitchen area. Six years of little kids spills, puppy chewing, and some unfortunate run-ins with the vacuum had made our current sofa pretty shabby. Jay suggested we go to a local, very large furniture store outlet to scope some possibilities.

We were on the second floor of the outlet center in a gigantic open room with rows and rows of all shapes and colors of upholstery. Jay and I kept moving through the rows, easily eliminating most, if not all the choices. The kids couldn't keep up with us and they stayed back in one of the first rows, messing around as kids would do if faced with hundreds of sofas.

Jay and I were halfway across the room when we heard a shout. We saw Sadie running toward us as fast as she could, her face a mix of excitement and determination. Inwardly, I panicked. All I could think was that Lily must have peed or worse on one of the sofas. The emergency exit plan was forming in my mind when Sadie arrived and said:

"Lily just lost her tooth and here it is!" With that, she thrust this little white tooth about the size of a grain of rice into my face.

I quickly looked across the room to Lily and shouted her name. Lily, still sitting on a sofa, stood up, turned to me and with fist pumping in the air, started jumping up and down. Her little ponytail was just bouncing in the air and her smile was as big as I have ever seen it, despite being one tooth less. She was thrilled.

Sadie continued the tale by stating that she had offered a piece of gum to Lily and when Lily bit into it, the tooth just came out. It was Lily's right bottom tooth.

Lily ran to me and we went to the bathroom to get some paper towels for blood, which was surprisingly little. It was clearly much looser than I had realized. From that moment on, whenever she saw anyone in the store, she announced with every ounce of pride in her, "I lost my tooth!"

My youngest and last child is losing her baby teeth. Another end of a season and the transition into a new one.

The End of a Decade...

The 2000s. Almost over. Hanging out for another 14 and a half hours. When I was younger I thought for sure we would all be jetting around in Jetson air cars by this point. Why aren't we? And what about that transporter in Star Trek? At least we got the internet, right?

I would like to think that this past decade brought the lowest of lows that I will ever experience in my lifetime. Conversely, I hope to experience more highs in the next decade, but who wouldn't? The '00s brought the loveliest highs: the birth of my three children, the house we live in, the start of a our company. And the most unimaginable lows: the cancer and death of my sister, the death of three grandparents, the splintering of certain family relationships, my back injury and surgery. When I think about it, I lost nearly half of the decade to the first "low" when you combine the 3 year journey and subsequent emotional coma/post-traumatic stress syndrome I existed in for 2 years after. To say that I am ready for this turn of the calendar, the end of writing the mark of the year with a zero and another number is an understatement.

I have always seen this one night as some line of demarcation, as does most of the world. As if this one night, one page turn signals drastic change. One door closing on what was, the past that is never alterable except in science fiction shows. One door opening to what is to come. A time of unlimited possibilities, a blank slate, optimistically waiting to be written. In reality, you can pick any day of the calendar year for this, right? It is all a choice for change.

So what are my choices for change in 2010? I like to use the word "goals" as you can make an action plan, take steps to get to a goal. The word "resolution" denotes more of an immediate change or else you you face assured failure so I don't use it. Here is my little list:

1. To submit some writing samples for consideration to be published. I won't even go into actually getting published because that is out of my hands. I will start with this little baby step of submitting.

2. To commit to an exercise routine 2 days /week. I won't get into how much weight I want to lose or how tone I want to be. In the past I have ridiculously written that I want to run in a 10 k or try an mini-triathlon. Two days is an insanely simple goal. In fact, 2 days probably wouldn't even change my body shape, but I feel like it is reachable. I might like it so much that I will go for 3 days and gasp...surpass my goal. I would like to throw in tennis into the mix. My very short stint in 2009 (2 times) reminded me how much I love the game.

3. Take one course that will tap into my creativity, as if I can claim to have any to begin with! Maybe this is just a pottery class at the YWCA, who knows. But something small, short and a start.

4. To find a place of fulfillment, spiritually. Tough and uneven roads have been all I have found over the past 3 years. This is the toughest goal to create a plan for. I know what I need to do, but will it work? Will my heart be more open to receive and live out what is so challenging at times?

5. Finally, I want to find a place of contentment. My vision is to rise above the hiccups of every day life so that it does not cause injury to my soul. That is connected with #4 most definitely. But, more so, in my daily living. The fact that I have become a tooth grinder at the last half of this year saddens me. It can only be from stress that this has begun. My anxiety has grown leaps and bounds and the sources of it are just absurd, mundane, unimportant events that are normal, every day events for 99% of the world. Control freak. Period. Gotta change it. Steps include counseling, possible acupuncture and massage therapy, a visit to my dentist and of course, lots of prayer.

And, so that completes the list of changes I would like to make in 2010. May it be a blessed year for us all.

A check on 2009

Here were my goals for 2009, copied and pasted from the original post here. Let's see how I did:

1. To laugh more, enjoy life more. To be more spontaneous. FAILED and failed miserably.

2. To document my life more consistently whether in blogging, scrapbooking or other means. SUCCEEDED, I think by two blog posts!!! I did develop a scrabooking plan to get me current which has gotten me excited about my hobby again.

3. To serve others in my community. To find my place, my niche, which I currently don't have. FAILED, although I know for sure we did more for others this Christmas season, so maybe I started on the right path. It just took me a while to get here. Still don't have a consistent schedule though.

4. To find myself spiritually again. This became a little muddled in 2008. Note to self: future blog topic. FAILED, but we did take steps to change this in the latter half of 2009. New bible study in the fall, church visiting, etc.

5. OK, so this is silly, but well, I will still type it despite a very high probability of being ridiculed for it - to be able to play ONE song on the drums at the expert level of Rock Band. SUCCEEDED!
And, #6, Get rid of this squirrel! SUCCESS!

It was a mixed bag, but I am ok with it. Even in the failures, I see promise. Onto 2010!

A Birthday Tradition

We have had a birthday tradition in our family for as long as I have been alive. At least I can say that I don't recall it ever NOT being a part of our family. I am splitting hairs.

Anyway, every year, my grandmother calls each and every family members' names to the Birthday Contest on a local radio station, WMFR. The morning show, hosted by Max Meeks, airs every Monday - Friday from 5:30 - 9 am. When our birthdays fell over the weekend, my grandmother would call it in on the Friday before or the Monday after. I could write a blog post just about my grandmother's dedication to this losing endeavor, but will save that for another time.

The contest consists of a number is chosen "at random" from what sounds like a bunch of paper in half of a gift box from a local department store. The number is then "matched up" to the corresponding name on the list of people whose names have been called into the show. The winner receives a slew of gift cards to local merchants, including a cake from the Sweet Shoppe Bakery, a car wash from Twin Oaks and bar-b-que from Kepley's. It is nothing life changing, but certainly nothing to scoff at as a native High Pointian.

For 37 years, with the exception of the year I lived abroad, my name has been called into this morning show. And every year, I lose. I have never won this contest. Never. Ever.

I gave up hope in my early 20s. Year after year of disappointment turned my heart against this local station and its dj, Max Meeks. When I was younger I would get up early before school in order to hear my name called on the radio. Year after year, my number wouldn't be called. Year after year, the disappointment turned into bitterness. I was convinced the contest was rigged. I mean, really?Who loses a contest 37 years in a row?!?!?

To add to the rejection, my grandmother believes, erroneously, that somehow in this random drawing of numbers that you can "come close" to winning. For example, if #15 was drawn, and I was #14, my grandmother would exclaim, "Oh, you were only one number off. So close!" If only I had just put forth a little effort in being #15, you know, I might have made it!

We enter the year 2009. The only ones who have not won the birthday contest in our family are me and my father. Oh, and the irony of it all, my grandmother!!! So, in October, I get a call from my dad, early in the morning to inform me, no, make that goad, taunt and tease me, that HE won the birthday contest. To add to this insult, a month later, I was given the most disappointing of all news. Max Meeks, after 50 years of radio hosting is retiring! The end of the birthday contest is looming ahead.

My birthday: December 30th. His retirement date: January 1. It has all come down to this. My last chance, my last opportunity to put forth some addition effort to "be" that winning number and receive the coveted prizes. I hear they even have some facial laser treatment gift certificate now, which I could really, really use approaching 38.. Can I have hope? Can I dream?

Details to come tomorrow morning ...

Christmas 2009

Glimpses of Christmas memories 2009:

"Warm milk! Santa HAS to have warm milk!" That was the shout of my Sadie as we entered the house on Christmas Eve. "The Santa watch" presented by the weather man on the local television channel showed that Santa was definitely in the Triad so the two girls who still believe were crazy to get home and get in bed.

Before going to dinner for Christmas Eve festivites, our little family of 5 gathered around the advent wreath while Jay read Luke 2, Christ's birth. We followed it by talking about the 4 elements of the advent - hope, joy, peace and love. The kids talked about how Jesus brings each of those to us. We ended this special family time by taking turns pray. I loved Sadie's in particular. She said, "God, please help Santa fit into our chimeny because it is small. And, God, please help us to put Jesus first as he is the reason we celebrate." I love how she prayed about Santa first then asks God to help us remember Jesus. Ethan contributed a great verse about Peace he had recently learned at school. Lovey Lily simply said, "I love you, Jesus." Sweetness.

At dinner with my family tonight, Lily was quite whiny and quite active. I pulled the Santa card. She promptly told me that I did NOT know how to get in touch with Santa. My uncle, hearing this little exchange, quickly entered a "Santa" number on his cell phone. I handed it to Lily, asking her what it said. "Santa," she said and quickly sat up in her chair and ate her green beans. Nice touch, Uncle Danny!

Christmas morning brought a wake-up shake at 6:45. We have had earlier wake-ups on Christmas morning, so I am ok with this one. Our tradition is that the kids must sit at the top of the stairs to wait for us to get the lights on, cameras ready, etc. We love seeing their anticipating faces. When we give the "Ok" they bolt down the stairs to their respective piles of goodies from Santa. This year brought new scooters to each of them - Lily got a plasma car which is propelled by moving the steering wheel; Ethan got a spark scooter and Sadie got a v-wing scooter. The various dsi games were also a hit. We (Mom and Dad) always get the exciting task of giving them clothing and this was no exception as each of the kids received snow bibs, gloves and long john underwear. I love how our kids feign excitment over gifts that don't hold a candle to Ninetnedo. At least they were very appreciative.

After opening and unpackaging the "goods", using a large garbage bag to try to confine the discarded wrap and bows, we got dressed and headed to Grammy's for the day. We stayed all day long which was a tradition I had at my own grandmother's growing up. The day included a lovely nap, lots of food and two large puzzles. We were obsessed with them.

Arriving home after dinner, we allowed the kids to play with their toys for a little while and then headed everyone to bed. A nice, laid-back Christmas Day during which we were able to reflect upon Him.